ghosts are good company

i know that sometimes it seems like choir is the only thing i talk about, probably because it… is the only thing i talk about. i started grad school and quit my job (again!) since i last posted, but really.

election day marked a year of choir, in which it has grown exponentially in awesomeness and more than doubled in the amount of time we meet each week. yesterday was kimya’s birthday, and she was super sick. she requested that her friends post videos of themselves singing soft rock, but instead of soft rock i decided to have choir work on a response to this new song of hers… we recorded it and i made it into a moving picture. hooray!

this weekend is gender jam: olympia’s 2009 lad.i.y. and trans fest. i’m greatly anticipating many of the awesome workshops (nat and i are taking our little brother to chelsea baker’s “comics aren’t just for boys” workshop – it’s one of chelsea’s comics that closes out the video), and then sunday’s free choir practice is going to be part of gender jam as well, from four to six, in fertile ground guesthouse’s living room. it’d be a great first visit to choir, if you’ve been holding back – there should be lots of other new folks too, and we’re focusing on making sure that everybody is able to feel super welcome.

my extracurriculars have been making life pretty tasty lately. there’s been knitting, which is always fun but extra-fun since it’s full of good queers! and then, mostly, there’s been choir which has been great. i joked when i decided to stay in olympia that it was for sophie and the choir(, which at that point was pending), and now that sophie’s up and moved to portland, i have to say that choir’s almost worth it on its own (not to say that i don’t miss sophie. i just got an amtrak free companion ticket and i’m going to make nat come with me to visit her and erica at some point). i’ve found it’s the same with a few of us – that even if we don’t want to go be social, we go to choir and leave feeling awesome.

nat’s feeling awesome RIGHT NOW because his top surgery funding has just come through – he can pay for it!, he just needs to make an appointment. (he says, not actually in a monotone, “i feel like jumping up and down for joy.”) i’m excited for that too, and also because i’m typing this on my new tiny computer. it’s named after our “darling, dearest, dead” friend otka, and has only fallen on the floor once – when i got butter too excited about the toy he was chasing around, causing him and otka to go flying. i’ve hidden that toy, but he’s since found another one.

……and now he’s been sitting in the dryer for the last twenty minutes.

national mentoring month celebrations went well, and i had a good time and learned a lot at the guiding lights weekend, as well. it’s really strange to go from the hectic-ness of january to a february that has almost nothing on my to-do list.

but, i’m sure i’ll figure something out. knit-n-nature is one thing i really want to do. fort flagler is one of my favorite places, and combining that with knitting? yes please.

… which reminds me that i should get back to the argyle sweatervest that i’m knitting for butter.

i didn’t get the job. i mean, i might get the job in the future. but they’re not going to hire me as immediately as they had suggested. so i’m frustrated, and not sure where to go from here with some of my plans.

nat came home today and excitedly announced that he was surprising me with dinner guests (or an invitation to be dinner guests? i wasn’t paying too much attention, because). the response he got was perhaps not as he expected, as it involved me groaning (and whining!) in a fetal position. after consultation with said potential dinner companion as to where a low income health clinic could be found (yay after-hours and the lack of health insurance) and a visit to the doctor (i hate doctor visits), it was determined that i had a bladder infection. go go team awesome. i’m feeling a little better now, still not-so-great but stunned by nat’s rockstardom around a medical ‘emergency’ and the related anxiety/incompetence that builds in me around medical situations.

it was my mom’s birthday yesterday! it sounds like she had a great day, which is what she deserves. part of the frustration with changing plans is that i was hoping to see her this weekend, and now i’m not sure if i should head down there or not.

those are the things on my mind, this 3:35am. i’m heading back to sleep, and hope that your rest is better than mine.

although it’s been raining wonderfully for the past seven hours, and that’s perfect.

CIMG4072

Originally uploaded by geoffy

i found my missing login information! that’s always a good thing.

i’ve been wandering around the puget sound region lately, sleeping on couches for the last month. currently i’m in des moines, at the kindness of my grandparents. their house is one of my favorite places, it has such a beautiful view of the water – i just wish that it were reasonably public transportationable.

the region is making me antsy, and i’m hoping that opportunities elsewhere pan out soon. for now i’ve been making mini-trips to pretend that i’m going somewhere; last weekend a friend and i explored bainbridge island. it was very very warm.

also last weekend i met up with some of my (now) favorite strangers from the internet, in BALLARD of all places. i got to go to archie mcpheeee where i found a fantastic green dinosaur finger puppet (see photo!) and spent too much money.

ALSO last weekend, the derby liberation front beat the throttle rockets, which was delightful but also sad as it was mommacherry’s last bout with the team. the team, mascots and all, did their introductions in aprons in homage to mommacherry, which amused me since i was wearing an apron that day anyway.

this weekend has, unsurprisingly, been calmer.

a few years ago i started a trans group at my college… now my baby group has grown up without me, and i’m back with exciting plans. the first year we did an open mic focusing on people talking about their bodies, generally specific parts of them. this quarter, i want to do it again, with a lot of prep time and beauty. we’re meeting tomorrow to iron more stuff out, and i’ve scheduled space for on editing workshop at the end of april. what’s next on the list is, of course: a name.

i was drawn the body project, until i remembered… that’s a book. that i just purchased for class. which you can see in the video in my last post. the body monologues is just too… yeah. i’m thinking maybe bodies talk? but that seems a little too talking heads. i want… something inviting and fairly obvious to folks seeing the fliers, something that mayyybe gets into gender, but also is open to other folks – largely this is about how people experience the world through their bodies, and how those bodies affect those experiences.

maybe i need to pull out a thesaurus. hmm.

moral of the story: advice, please?

and so it goes. it’s olympia, it’s raining. i can hear the rain on my balcony. i’ve moved into a house just above the fourth avenue bridge, with: two cats, three kids, four dogs and, come may, five adults. my room is pretty big – maybe twelve by eighteen, or a little bigger (larger than two pucks plus three pucks), plus closets. it’s got nicely green walls, two redorange doors, and a yellow ceiling, which matches the trim on the windows and th balcony doors. it might be hailing, actually; the rain is bouncing a bit more than usual.

at first i thought there was no wireless here, but there is and that is helpful – for one of my classes our weekly assignments are primarily blog-based, which makes sense. for another i have to have a livejournal, which makes less sense.

all of my classes seem pretty awesome, which is delightful. five courses means scads of reading, but it should be good. i’m trying to not get too distracted by student activities and such this quarter, but i have a plan simmering for a giant final project for myself/STAR (my trans group grew up without me!). if i want to make it happen i have to start NOW (after i get my homework for this week in order), so i need to decide if i want to commit as much time as it needs. i’m currently trying to have my entire College Experience As a Single Person in one quarter, so that’s exhausting in itself.

there is a corgi demanding my attention. i must go.

i have a challenge between making this blog [my] “family friendly” and making it… about much of my life. but i guess since folks wouldn’t know me very well at all without knowing this, i spend the vast majority of my social time engaged it trans community activism and/or at the “local queerlady-owned sexuality boutique” – “a sex store even your mother would love.”

partially i bring this up because they (the rubber rose, the store mentioned above), just hosted the annual traveling roadshow that is the sex worker’s art show. i’ve been four out of the last five years now, and this year i had the most fun (even though nomy lamm wasn’t on the tour), largely because carly and lea (see above queerladies) made it such an awesome environment.

i attribute the environment mostly to lea and carly, even though the show was at a different venue, because it had the same spirit of delight, enthusiasm, and wonder that makes all of the rubber rose’s events awesome. still, it was missing as much of a feeling of power (youtube, sound) as some of their past events. the show was at a different venue becauuuuse the rubber rose has permit Issues. due to their being an “adult business” apparently there is a whole laundry list of things that are not allowed in their performance space. which drives me crazy.

ah, well. if you haven’t missed it yet, go see the art show. and if you’re in the area, go give the rubber rose some money. because i can’t. because i still don’t have a job. awesome!! oh: and official no-go on amsterdam today. double-awesome.

i decided to backpedal – um, skate backward – with my skating practice. i’ve been going to boot camp with the san diego derby dolls off and on, but having trouble there because i’m Just Not Good Enough. so i decided (on the recommendation of a skater who used to live in s.d. but has recently moved down from san francisco…) to try out the Adult Skating Lessons at skateworld. they’re shorter, cheaper, and more geared to people my level – and also a totally different kind of workout! we were doing a “scissor” thing around the rink, where you use your legs to move your feet out and in without lifting them up? and ow, my thighs. i don’t get this much of a thigh workout just striding.

so that hurts. but also, i managed to fall down and kick myself pretty hard in the inner-thigh. no wonder derby’s hardcore, if i can injure myself this much just on my own. i haven’t worn my skatetown shirt to the rink yet (it was a “paulie bleeker is totally boss” day, so orange – but different orange), but i hope to soon.

and i did actually skate backward today! woo!

there’s been discussion lately about “yo” as an organically developing gender neutral pronoun, but none of the discussion that i’ve seen really addresses race or class issues, which i find… fascinating… especially considering the demographics of the communities contriving other gender neutral pronouns so far.

(note my not addressing it either? i’m just bringing it up for people to think about what connotations “yo” has in their minds.)

i’m still an epicene “they,” myself, and damn anyone who tries to tell me that it’s grammatically incorrect. they seem like probably the people who would make sad faces at me if i took “it” instead, and if they want to find something 1) grammatically correct 2) not dehumanizing 3) that flows well in language, i welcome them to go ahead – and tell me when they’ve found it.

dear buffy musical,

i kind of love you.

i’m just sayin’. i was petrified about last night, about going by myself, until i saw that they were looking for people to assemble goody bags (“i used to do this all by myself, until i realized that people might be willing to help me!” / “when did you start having people help you?” / “oh, about three shows ago.”), and so i did that and met people and then i wasn’t all by myself! which is awesome.

and while i was the only one really injecting the musical with the overabundance of lewd that it so obviously deserves, it was still full of the sauce of awesome, because everybody was having a great time and being clever.

it also plays tonight, and i am hoping hoping to go again (that would be, um, my third time?). hurray!

last night i made a mix cd based on seattle – songs about seattle, not by people in seattle. it’s a little obvious, a little lewd, and a little amusing. do any of you want a copy? maybe we could do a mix cd swap? if you’re interested, leave a comment and we can exchange addresses or whatever by email.

here’s the cover image (shrinkified):

the image is from the pi. a “composite photograph” from 1986. ’shop!

the tracklist, in case anyone’s interested:

The Long Winters – Prom Night At Hater High
Craig Chaquico & Russ Freeman – Seattle Child
Brazen Abbot – Restless in Seattle
Abigail Anderson – Seattle
Bob Rivers – West Seattle Girls
Sir Mix-a-Lot – Posse On Broadway
The Postal Service – This Place Is A Prison
Anti-Flag – Seattle Was A Riot
The Business – Holiday in Seattle
Kimya Dawson – I Will Never Forget
Connie Smith – Seattle
Steve Vai – The Boy From Seattle
Bill Cosby – Seattle

in a different direction, fish with no name is no more. apparently i fail at having a fish. the building i’ve been working in has amaaazing fish in the lobby, but i won’t be working here after tomorrow. i wonder if they’d mind me coming in to see the fish anyway. :D