we’re still slogging* along. we’re getting more bids, looking for a place to live in town, and learning lots. it’s been two-and-a-half months or so (43 days, my curious brain just counted), but it feels like incredibly longer, to be superlative, and/or like it’s been at least three months, to be oddly specific. my brain is making space for a lot of truths right now, just from not knowing how things will go next.

my mother took over the contractor-contacting process after I got too overwhelmed by it, and provided warm validation of how surprisingly emotionally exhausting it is. on top of these apparently being the flakiest people you’ll ever meet, once you hear from them they want to know all of the logistical details (which makes sense, because that’s their job) but also the things that just feel like rubbernecking voyeurism.

I think we’ll be moving on from bids soon, though. some progress will feel good, even if we can’t imagine how we’ll afford that progress.

…

so we’re staying out in the county, in a studio where some friends are kindly letting us crash until we find a place in town. they are being super generous with their space and resources, which is highly appreciated.

for solstice I set up some candles and spent some time in quiet. before this all started I had been planning to host a solstice party because so many of us need(/ed) a space to mark transitions and start fresh.

as I worked on throwing positive energy into the new year, I heard a shotgun-pitched crack and found, upon investigation, that the candle heat had spun a crack halfway up the inner pane of the window.

awesome, life. always a trickster.

*oh, also slogging because the basement flooded in all this rain we’ve been having, too.

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